Did you Know ‘Eating’ a workmate is abominable? Never to try it!

By Aunt Hommy

After sleeping with your workmate, then what?

Every adult has been in a situation where he has dipped his pen into company ink or a company pen has written in her book. If you haven’t, you have not lived yet.

Proximity is one of the greatest reasons there is office romance. Having to work with someone day in and day out. Spending almost 8 hours of your weekdays with certain human beings eventually makes you vulnerable to them.

The bigger the number of employees, the higher the number of sexual activities. The more you grow as a company, the more people chew each other. It is a given.

No matter how many ‘Articles’ are put in place to prevent office romance, people are definitely chewing each other, and it is just an open secret.

Unless the company is into child labour or your workplace also invests in nepotism, there is no one at your office you cannot chew. That means there are no cases of defilement but higher rates of emotional damage.

People suspect. Some have opened office doors, and lips are locked. Some have been overwhelmed by feelings and actually confessed.

Your workmates know who is doing who on the low key, and because the workspace is meant for mature people, it is mostly none of their business until you make it their business.

Office romance has always been exposed by the individuals involved. They will brag about it, someone will want others to know that they are the ones doing the boss, someone will get pregnant, or feelings will explode, and bedroom/lodge issues will be brought to the boardroom.

Office romance will only affect how someone delivers their work if the terms and conditions are unclear. There must always be an MOU before you start playing with company ink.

Most of the time, the people engaging are committed to other partners outside the workspace. They are always in some kind of situationship. Office manenos always start when one person opens up about romance troubles at home.

When you start telling them about your personal business, they are about to chew you. You look forward to going to the office and ranting about the bad nights without sex.

You want to tell them how it was another night of him sweating on top of you and you not cumming.

The office Prince will always assure the Princess how they can deliver if they ever got in the sheets with a hard-working woman, they know she is. “I would lick your pain away.” “You deserve a better sex life after all the work you put in.”

And just like that, hugs give way. You cry in their chest. They slightly lift your chin, kiss the tears away and before you know it, you are in a hotel room tearing the clothes off your workmate.

The first months of office sex are so hot you can’t imagine anything going wrong. She seems to understand your situation outside work. She wants to believe she can be your painkiller until the hot new workmate walks in, and you still want to taste if her company ink is really for your pen or was meant to write in your book.

A few snippets of jealous gestures, to silent treatment and boom, DC (Disciplinary Committee). Now everyone in the company knows you chewed each other, and as the ‘Article’ states, one of you has to go.

Because you need to explain your rubbish at home, the whole world now knows that you have been stealing company ink and using it at home. You are kinda screwed in every sense of the word.

Before you decide whether you want to undress the workmate in your department or not, make sure you know how it will end. If you doubt the person’s maturity, control yourself and let it go.

You will always know how mature the people in your office are. Most people at work who doubt other people’s emotional intelligence are always referring to the fact that if you ever make a mistake with that person, you are doomed at work.

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